My marriage, never very easy or happy, deteriorated alarmingly when we moved house and city for me to start a new job.
My then wife, who had always been erratic in her mood and behaviour, became increasingly hostile to me and to my older son, then four years old. We were trying to buy a house at the time, and it turned out she and her family, who were from another country, had plans for the property which were incredibly unfair to me. She began to mention divorce, and taking the children abroad, as a threat to make me accept her plans about the house.
I petitioned for divorce and residence of the children and was met with a cross application for residence of the children and an application for Leave to Remove to another jurisdiction. I knew it was very rare for Dads to win such cases. We had a terrible year waiting for the hearing, when we had to share the same house. The hearing ended with a ruling that the children stay in the country, and for shared residence.
Five years on I see my children more days of the week than not, and the level of conflict with my ex-wife is diminishing. I can have a huge input into my children’s lives and I feel more involved than many other dads are. At the beginning of the whole process, my solicitor offered this when I asked for advice. “Don’t get into arguments with her, and do as much as you can with the kids.” That advice has never let me down since.
Name and location changed.
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